Journal

I was so pleased that I finally got EnergyAustralia to change the name associated with my account that I didn't pay much attention to what they had changed it to. This turns out to have been a significant blunder on my part. A couple of days ago they emailed me to say that they can't apply the usual low income concession to my next bill because the surname they had for me doesn't match the name on my government concession card.

Oh, for…! There's only five letters in my surname! How could they have managed to drop one while copying it from my birth certificate to their database?

I phone them, and then I email them. It turns out they also have an issue with my address, so can I send them some proof of my address as well? So I go looking for another utility bill with my street address on it, and that's when I discover that Greater Western Water have misspelled my first name!

I haven't kept a television set for nearly five years, but television fascinates me. I can trace this fascination to a single program, starting one evening at my grandparent's house.

One evening just after dinner I was watching the little black and white portable television in the spare room and, on a whim and for the first time ever, watched a whole episode of Doctor Who. I was hooked.

I had a phone call yesterday.

I only get phone calls from three sources: my mother, who calls at precisely the same time every week; my best friend, who calls when walking the dog around a neighbourhood so tediously uniform that even listening to me drone on about my aches and pains leavens the experience somewhat; and robo-scammers. Anybody else texts or emails. Presumably for fear of interrupting my busy schedule. Or hearing about my aches and pains.

And it was from "Private Number", so either it was a robo-scammer, or possibly a government department which had suddenly "discovered" that I owed them thousands of dollars and could I please pay them by the end of the week, otherwise they'd take away my Low Income Health Care Concession Card and issue a Katy Should Pay Double For Absolutely Everything Card.

[The reader is advised to to hear the following in an Alan Bennett-style northern lilt.]

I feel torn between congratulating myself on how much I achieved this year, and chiding myself over what I didn't do. It's just my way, I suppose.

I Went Out in Public as Me

It seems hard to believe now, but the most I'd ever done prior to 2023 was to occasionally sneak out onto the back stairs of Hellscape Court with a glass of wine, late at night when I was reasonably certain the psychopaths had all passed out.

Today's life lesson is this:

Don't engage in an activity if, on the basis of what you know about yourself and the activity, there are reasonable grounds for believing it will likely be injuriously habit-forming.

It's not pithy; I'll work on it later. What brings it to mind is my need for a good old moan at the moment.

I'm a touch unwell just now.

I started using alcohol in my late teens because I was not a happy little Vegemite, and I wanted to die. So my problems were twofold: 

• It's jolly hard just getting through the day with that attitude, and
• I couldn't directly kill myself, because I'm incredibly squeamish.

I found that being slightly tipsy most of the time and very, very drunk the rest of the time solved the proximate issue, while ensuring that I was steadily working toward the larger objective.

I went into town for the last of 10 prepaid face-laserings this afternoon. Got an even more cursory treatment than usual from a new girl more intent on thoroughly dealing with her chewing gum than my face.

I said I was happy with results so far, and mainly concerned now with the (still quite blue) beer froth zone around my lips.

She worked a rather eccentric path around my neck, diligently chewing all the while, and quickly pronounced me done.

When I pointed out that she had stayed well clear of the region that I'd particularly wanted her to focus on, she apologised and quickly administered a few cursory blasts, but far fewer than I was used to.

Back out at the counter staffed by a clump of four or five more ardent gum-chewers, I was asked if I wanted to make another appointment, and braced myself for an upselling. But on telling them that this was the last episode of the current series, they seemed reluctant to renew the show for another year.