Giant White Houses are white, with jet-black accents: the shutters, the gutters, the rooves. They are giantâHulk housesâswollen to the very limits of the legally allowed property setback, and unnaturally tall. They feature a mishmash of architectural features, combining, say, the peaked roof of a farmhouse with squared-off sections reminiscent of city townhomes. They mix horizontal siding, vertical paneling, and painted brick willy-nilly.
Like the giant White House just down the road from us in Washington, D.C., the Giant White House may be occupied by a Republican or a Democrat, but whoever they are, they are rich. Once the house next door was finished, it went on the market for $2.5 million. The house has five bedrooms and six baths and is 5,600 square feet.
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Kate Wagner of McMansion Hell argued that this architectural incoherence stems, in fact, from the modern homebuyerâs saturation in Zillow and Redfin. âDesign magazines, HGTV, even Instagramâthose are really media empires of the past,â she said. âOverwhelmingly, by sheer monthly users, the way people interact with architecture now is through real estate listings. Weâre always Zillow browsing.â
And what do you see on Zillow? If youâre one of the lucky Americans who can afford to buy your first home, and you want to live in a neighborhood like our part of Arlington, you may find that the âstarter house,â as you once knew it, is awfully hard to find. Because land is worth so much and old houses, comparatively, are worth so little, when families sell small houses here, they sell them to developers, not to other families. And those developers, driven by fear and money, knock the small houses down to build GWHs. The more GWHs they build, the more the neighborhood is made up of GWHs. The more you scan Zillow, the more it starts to make sense: Like nearly a million Americans a year, youâre better off just buying a brand-new house, too.
After all, in an era when a home purchase is likely the most secure, lucrative investment you will ever make, a house really no longer is a house. It is no longer simply the place where you live. It is your future in building form. It is the way youâll pay for college, the way you might afford retirement. âI donât think we think of the dream home anymore,â Wagner said. âWe now see houses primarily as vehicles for investment. The best way to do that is if everything looks the same.â